From the NotcJust Tired Blog.
After a good day, or a spell of feeling pretty ok, it’s always a kick in the teeth when Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM) catches up with you. As I’m sure those of you living with ME/CFS, will be all too familiar with. For those not familiar, PEM is the worsening of ME/CFS symptoms after physical or mental activity – and this can be after minimal activity.
Sometimes a couple of days can pass by, and you have that glimmer of hope that you just may have escaped it this time. At the same time as looking over your shoulder waiting for it to appear. Then those unwanted yet familiar symptoms suddenly creep up, and wrap themselves around you like a poisonous snake, from which there is no escape. Dragging you down, weighing heavy on your already aching body, and sucking the life out of you.
Then comes the mental torture where you give yourself a hard time for having enjoyed yourself too much, or for doing that one extra task that you wish you’d ignored. If only I hadn’t done x, y or z, you hear yourself say. ME/CFS really is a head f*** of a disease (and I hardly ever swear!)! There is a very fine line between trying to live your life as well as possible (within our limitations of course), and “living” too much so you end up paying for it. And that’s for those of us with mild-moderate ME who are “lucky” enough to have a choice in the matter. Those who are severely affected have no such choice.
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